Hello everybody. Good afternoon to all of you. This is
Vineet Gautam, your trainer, your coach.
And today, actually I'm talking about a very crucial topic,
my favorite topics, confidence.
In the communication section, we are talking about the
corporate training section is going on.
What is the importance of the confidence? I'm going to talk
about confidence.
What is confidence? I have explained this in detail.
And then, we are talking about way to be more confident.
How can you become more confident?
Actually, we are going to talk about the nine tips.
By using those tips, you can be more confident about
whatever you are, whatever you are doing.
Whatever you are, whatever you are doing.
First, we said, stop comparing yourself to others.
You are unique in your own style.
Improve your own style, don't compare yourself to others.
Yes, take the lesson from others, but make yourself better.
Make your best version, don't be like others, don't try to
imitate anybody.
Don't try to be like others.
I want to be like myself, I want to be my best version.
I can learn from others, but I don't want to be like them.
I want to be like myself, but I want to give my best, I
want to give my best.
So, take the lesson from others, train yourself, take the
training, but improve yourself.
As you are, make your best version.
Surround yourself with positive people.
You can't do this, you can't do that, you can't be like
this, you can't be like that.
And gradually, your own opinion about yourself is good, it
diminishes.
It becomes dull, it ends slowly.
And their opinion sits in your mind.
And you think, yes, they are right, I can't do anything, I
am being stubborn without talking.
I am being stubborn without talking.
I don't have anything like that.
And you understand, that day has become the end for you.
Yes, if you are surrounded by positive people, they talk
good about you.
So, even though you are not that good, if good things come
to you, you are going to become positive, confident.
So, you start taking steps and your best.
Look, everyone has a lot of good things, a lot of power.
There is a lot of potential inside.
But we are not positive, we don't try to find it.
And we are not able to be our best.
Our best remains inside us.
And we can't find it.
Because, before doing anything, it is important to have a
state of mind.
It is important to have a mindset.
Yes, I have to find it.
I have to find it.
I have to become like this.
I have to do this.
And for this, it is important to be positive.
So, be in the surroundings of positive people.
I concluded the last line, if you feel bad about yourself,
after hanging out with your particular person.
If you feel bad about yourself, after hanging out with a
particular person.
Look, mostly we are not able to take such hard action.
We keep on doing things in some way and keep on troubling
our life.
We keep on troubling ourselves.
Become such a hard decision taker.
The person who keeps on saying bad things about you, about
your work.
And makes you feel low.
It may be time to say goodbye.
This is the right time to say goodbye to him.
And make a firm decision not to meet him again.
That I don't want to meet him again.
Many times people do this in a planned manner to finish
someone.
They get irritated.
Feeling jealous.
And they become friends because they want to be in his
company and finish him slowly.
Do you know?
When Duryodhana gave a good welcome to Pandavas' uncle in
Mahabharata,
That uncle was of Pandavas.
Who became the charioteer of Karna.
If you pay attention, you will understand.
He was the uncle of Pandavas.
But when Duryodhana was coming, he gave such a good welcome.
He was so happy that he said, who gave me such a good
welcome?
I am ready to give you whatever you ask me.
Then Duryodhana came in front of him.
And he said, you should fight on my behalf.
He was helpless.
But I am saying one thing.
After meeting Pandavas, he said, I am helpless.
I will have to fight on Duryodhana's behalf.
When Duryodhana became the charioteer of Karna.
He became the charioteer of Karna because Arjuna's
charioteer was Krishna.
Karna wanted a good charioteer.
At that time, Pandavas said to Duryodhana,
You are helpless.
You should always call Karna negative.
You should watch that episode.
If I had video clips, I would have shown you that episode.
Whenever they are in war, what does Karna's charioteer say?
Karna, Arjuna's words are different.
Are you seeing?
Karna is fighting with his strength.
He is cutting Arjuna's bow again and again.
He is not letting him shoot the bow.
But he is making him feel positive.
He is saying to Duryodhana, you are cutting Arjuna's bow
again and again.
But as long as you are shooting the bow again and again,
See what power Arjuna has.
He is tying his bow.
He is not saying that you are cutting.
He is tying his bow.
And gradually, he starts feeling negative about himself.
And the moment you start praising your enemy,
It is not bad until you start praising yourself.
But when you start calling yourself negative,
Which he made him do.
You are right.
Arjuna is really negative.
Arjuna's words are different.
So, when you start feeling bad about yourself,
That the person you are living with,
Your friend,
If you feel bad about yourself,
When you start feeling bad about yourself, After hanging
out with a particular person, You understand hanging out,
right?
After hanging out with a particular person,
You start feeling bad about yourself.
So, it may be time to say goodbye.
So, this is the right time to say goodbye to that person.
Say goodbye to that candidate.
Otherwise, you are going on the wrong track.
So, finally, what was the topic?
That you should surround yourself with good people.
You should make your society good.
Whatever you want to get,
If you are doing a job worth 20,000,
And you want to do a job worth 50,000,
You want to do a job worth 1 lakh,
And you are in the company of people worth 20,000 and
15,000,
This cannot happen until then.
If you want 50,000,
First make a thought of 50,000.
And then start hanging out with people worth 50,000.
Positive people.
Those who speak positively.
You will get that thought from there.
You will execute it,
And you will move forward.
Similarly, if you want to be positive,
Then start sitting in the society of positive people.
You, Listening to positive things about yourself,
You will become positive.
And the one who becomes positive, becomes confident.
I am seeing that a 14-year-old boy has written 5-5 books.
The people next to me have written 10-10 books.
And when I am in the training session there,
I am getting a mic to give a speech, so those who have
written 15-15 books, those people are also listening to
their speech and saying that you are having something
potential.
You can be the best trainer of the world.
When we hear these things from such people, it boosts our
confidence.
And in the last 4 months, I have written 4 books.
In the last 10-20 years, I have not been able to write.
Just, I am giving my own example.
Those things were there, but it seemed that you think too
much about yourself.
Useless things.
But I came on track.
When I went into that environment, I made them realize that
you are not useless, you are thinking right.
You have the potential.
You can do it.
And I did it.
I am doing.
I am very much happy also.
So, the one who says good things about you, hold on to that
society.
The one who says no, the one who is making you feel bad
about yourself, the one who makes you feel bad about
yourself, you are feeling bad about yourself.
You are feeling bad about yourself.
In whichever company, the company with whom you are hanging
out, feeling bad about yourself, it's time to say goodbye
to that person.
Say it today.
Do it today.
Say it today.
You understand, a new day has started for you.
A new sun has risen for you.
Hold on to a good person of your confidence level.
The one who boosts your confidence.
There are very precious people who boost your confidence.
It is said that a good friend of yours is more precious
than thousands of books.
It is said that if you want to gain knowledge, read books.
But a good friend who speaks positively to you, he also
speaks negatively about bad things. He also criticizes.
But he speaks positively.
So, he is more precious than thousands of books.
So, find a good friend.
Find him.
But if he is negative, before finding him, say goodbye to
him. Say it, goodbye.
And the next is coming,
Instead, surround yourself with people who love you and
want the best of you.
Say goodbye to a person who makes you feel bad about
yourself.
And go into the society of those people with the people who
love you.
Who love you.
Who like you.
And how?
They like you the way you are.
They accept you the way you are.
They like you.
And want the best for you.
And always want the best for you.
Always want the best for you.
So, how do you want to live with people?
Those who love you.
Those who like you.
And accept you the way you are.
And always talk about your well-being.
Seek out others who are positive and can help you.
Can help build your confidence.
Seek out those people who are positive and can help you
build your confidence.
Who is or who are helping you in build up your confidence
about yourself? That's the important part.
The important decision you are to take to make yourself
best.
Self-confidence and a positive attitude go hand in hand.
Self-confidence and positive attitude go hand in hand.
I was just talking about the next level of confidence is
your attitude.
So, whether you call it a positive attitude or
self-confidence, these two things work together.
If you have self-confidence, positive attitude will build
up.
If you don't have self-confidence, negative attitude will
build up.
Low confidence means negative attitude.
Self-confidence means positive attitude.
So, you saw the second important point.
Stay in the surroundings of positive people.
Keep your friend circle positive.
This is the second important point of confidence booster.
The nine tips I am giving you to boost your confidence is a
life-changing program.
This is not like the contents of a 6th, 7th or 8th grade
book.
The page has changed.
The next lesson has come.
No, Baba.
This is a life-changing program.
You need this at school level or college level.
Wherever.
Whether you are 6 years old or 60 years old, it doesn't
matter.
If you want to get your life changed, these tips are
necessary for you.
At each and every level, at whichever stage of the life you
are,
If you let go, you will remain where you are.
If you grab, you will move forward in life.
You will reach where you want to reach.
You dream, you think every day, but you are not ready to do
anything.
And if you are not ready to do, then how can you reach
there? You have to walk, Baba.
You have to walk.
So, I gave two points.
The second point is to take action.
The person you feel bad about yourself,
Say goodbye to him today.
And find such people, such a person,
Who makes you feel good about yourself.
Talks about your well-being.
Find such a candidate
Who helps you boost your confidence.
Next, the third point, I'm coming.
Take care of your body.
Now you will say that you take care of your body, what is
the relationship of confidence in this?
It is.
It is very important.
I was also talking in the confidence boosting section.
This tip for how to be more confident is based on the idea
that It's hard to feel good about yourself if you are
abusing your body.
If you are not feeling good, then you join a swimming
center.
You do yoga, meditation, jogging.
Do something to make yourself look better.
Change your look.
But you have to take care of your body.
Take care.
It is said that a healthy body keeps a healthy mind.
If the body is healthy, then only the mind will be healthy.
A healthy mind can lead you towards success.
So, you are in need to take care of your body.
Why? So that you can use it in real time and complete the
real task.
Complete the task.
When you practice self care, you know you are doing
something positive for your mind, your body and spirit.
When you do something good for yourself, you know you are
doing something good for your mind, your body and spirit.
And you will naturally feel more confident as a result.
And you feel confident about yourself.
You feel confident about yourself.
And I have told you earlier that when you feel confident
about yourself,
that vibration goes to other people and then other people
will also feel confident about you.
When you feel good about yourself, when you think good,
I have told you that you look good in front of the mirror
and you say,
Wow, I am looking nice, I am looking handsome today.
Who says that?
First of all, you say that to yourself and then the world
says that to you.
If you keep saying bad things to yourself, if you keep
getting frustrated and irritated,
then the world is not going to say good things to you.
So, you take care of your body.
Start caring for your body from today.
Here are a few self care practices linked to highest levels
of self confidence.
To increase self confidence, there are some important
things that will make your body better.
What was the topic? Take care of your body.
To make your body better, because you are not feeling good,
that means there is something missing, if there is
something missing, make it better.
To make your complexion, lightness, physics, walking, time,
it is not that you get sick or have pain.
When you take care of it, it is said that what you care
for, that thing cares for you.
You drive a car and if you don't get it maintained on time,
then it is going to deceive you.
Yes.
If you love it, care for it, then it is going to care for
you on time,
it is not going to deceive you on time.
This happens in relationships.
You are in a relationship and you don't care for the other
person,
but you expect that he will care for you.
How will he care for you?
You say friends indeed is a friend in need.
We always say that a true friend is one who is helpful on
time.
But we don't apply this definition on ourselves.
We always apply it on others.
That my friend is not helpful on time, that is why he is
not a good friend.
First apply it on yourself.
You should be helpful on your friend's need.
Similarly, when everyone applies it on themselves,
where does the problem start?
When we don't do it ourselves, we expect it from the other
person.
I am not caring for my partner in my relationship,
but I want him to care for me.
How will that happen?
I should think from my side, not expect.
I was saying yesterday that expectation and desire are the
root of our problems.
When we expect from others and our expectations are not
fulfilled,
we feel pain.
At the place of why not you are going to take care of the
next person.
Similarly, when he thinks that I should care for the other
person,
then without expecting, both will care for each other.
Problem is solved.
Problem will not happen.
But where does the problem start?
That I don't care, but expect.
They don't care, but expect.
Problem starts.
So, if you don't want to start your problem,
then you should be an action taker from your side.
You should side with your expectations.
So here, you have to care for your body,
which is going to help you to boost your confidence,
How?
First, you will care for your diet.
Healthy eating.
Healthy eating comes with many benefits,
including higher level of confidence and self-esteem.
When you fuel your body with nutrient foods,
you feel healthier, stronger and more energized,
which can result in feeling better about yourself.
Okay?
So, when you take the right diet,
your body will feel stronger and energized.
And when you feel stronger and energized,
as a result, you start feeling better about yourself.
So, when you feel better,
your confidence will be boosted.
As a trainer, I can say that
when I feel better,
I get so many emotions and ideas
that I can record for 5 hours
and write 10 pages.
I can tell you the feeling of an author,
because I am an author myself,
that when you are in a good mood,
even if it is 2 in the night, it can be 2 in the morning.
You have to write at that time.
You will think that you will take a bath at 2 in the morning
and sit on the table
and then start writing.
Sit down.
Sit down, take a bath and sit on the table.
You don't have any idea.
Write whatever you want.
You don't know about the mood.
When your body is relaxed,
you are enjoying, eating and drinking.
You don't feel any pain.
You are relaxed.
When your body is relaxed,
your mind will be relaxed
and you get creative ideas in your relaxed mind.
When your body is not relaxed,
your mind will not be relaxed
and if your mind is not relaxed,
you get ideas and forget.
So, that's why I am saying here
that you are in need to take care of your body
and for that, it is important to take a proper healthy diet.
The second important part is exercise.
Studies consistently show that
physical exercise boosts self-confidence.
You start feeling better because of exercise.
So, exercise makes you feel confident.
How?
For instance, a 2016 study found that
a study was conducted in 2016
and it was found that
physical activity improves participants' body image
and when their body image improved, they felt more
confident.
When your body image improves,
you feel more confident.
Let me tell you in a normal way.
When you exercise,
your body shape improves,
you feel healthy
and when your body shape improves,
other people appreciate you.
You are feeling better
and other people appreciate you.
Wow! What a body!
So, don't you feel good?
I am talking at a very low level.
I am not talking about books.
When someone says to you,
what a physique!
Don't you feel good?
You feel good, right?
So, when you feel good,
as I said earlier,
appreciation boosts the confidence.
So, you are getting appreciation,
and confidence will be boosted.
Yes! You are good, you are healthy, you can work on time,
you don't get sick, that's a different thing.
But when you get appreciation in this way, still your
confidence is getting boosted, isn't it? And we are talking
about confidence booster here.
Yeah? So, you feel better when you are having a healthy
body. Healthy body means healthy mind.
Relaxed body means relaxed mind.
And relaxed mind can have better idea, creativity, you can
do something better, you can do something creative.
And the most important thing is that you are able to
execute and implement the idea that you have got.
Because your body is supporting you.
Many times you feel that you want to do it, but your body
is not supporting you.
Oh, I am not feeling well, why should I take all this
trouble? Done? Finished? So, in that situation also it is
very very much required.
And you know, when you get appreciation from somewhere, if
someone says in your eyes, wow, what a great thing, then a
person starts jumping, you know?
Whether he says it to someone or not,
Today, you know, girls are performing successfully in every
field because they get appreciation in abundance.
Everyone keeps appreciating.
Every day you get dozens, tens of thousands.
And these appreciations are boosting the confidence, they
are getting the power, the confidence everywhere, they are
performing better.
All the way, everywhere.
Leave the IIT need, leave it in the IIT section, leave it
in the accounts field.
Today, girls have started topping in UPSC.
Now we feel, yes ma'am, what to do?
I am in the education field, in the education field already
all teachers, principals of good schools, all ladies.
So, appreciation is always matter.
First we talked about healthy body, we talked about take
care of body, we talked about diet, we talked about
exercise, and now I am talking about the meditation.
What is meditation? More than just a relaxation practice,
meditation can help boost self-confidence.
Relaxing yourself.
I will give you simple tips as a coach, mind coach.
Whenever you are going to do any work, whatever it is, you
do deep breathing, just thrice.
Do it three times, whatever it is.
If you want to start a task in the office, if you want to
give a presentation, you can do it wherever you are.
Do deep breathing thrice.
Take a deep breath, hold it for two seconds, and then
release it.
Take a deep breath, take it inside, hold for two seconds,
and then release.
Once you get focused, you will be self-introduced to what
is going on in your mind.
You will be self-introduced.
And then the presentation you give will be yours.
To understand this, you have to understand it in detail.
I am telling you, it will be yours.
Many times you act like others, you speak like others, and
you expect the result to be like yours.
How will it be, Baba?
First, you have to get into yourself.
For this, deep breathing, meditation is a very important
part.
It improves the focus.
You can concentrate yourself.
It is more than just a relaxation practice.
Meditation can help boost self-confidence in several ways.
For one, it helps you to recognize and accept yourself.
It helps you to recognize and accept yourself.
By meditating, you can identify who you are exactly.
And to accept who you are.
Mostly, we don't accept ourselves.
We live our lives in the air, in our dreams.
Whatever you are, wherever you are, accept it.
The day you accept it on the ground level, from that day,
your process of moving forward will start.
But until you keep flying in the air, you are not moving
forward, you are wasting time.
I will give you a simple example.
When we go to temples, to do darshan, we have to wait in a
long queue, right?
When you see the queue, you are worried, oh my god, it is
such a long queue, how do I do it? When you see the long
queue, you are thinking, should I make a plan, should I
look here, should I look there? Whether a plan is made or
not, you are trying in
the air.
And in the process of trying, you have wasted an hour.
And there was another person with you.
Within a minute, without thinking, he got in the queue.
He got in the queue, and you kept wandering here and there
for an hour, kept making plans, kept thinking, go home, go
back, what should I do?
After an hour, when you were forced to get in the queue,
then you saw that he was standing in front of 200 people,
who were standing with you.
Because he had accepted his real situation an hour ago,
that he has to get in the queue.
He got in, and in an hour, he walked so far ahead.
Now he is going to be ahead of you in the queue.
And you wasted an hour in the air, you did not accept
yourself at all.
You accepted your real situation.
It can be painful.
If you accept your real situation, it will be painful.
But there is victory over pain.
At least you will move forward.
He accepted that he has to get in the queue, he got in.
And now, after an hour, he is 200% ahead of you.
He is ahead of 200 people.
The sooner you accept yourself, the sooner your journey to
success will begin.
If you do not accept, then you are wasting your time.
And in accepting, meditation helps you.
So you cannot deny its importance.
Meditation also teaches you to stop negative self-talk.
Meditation also prevents you from negative self-talk.
And disconnects you from unhelpful mental chatter
interfering with you.
And it also tries to remove any negativity that is
happening in your surroundings.
You move away.
You are frustrated, you get angry.
Meditate.
You can control it.
You get angry.
What do we do when we are angry?
We rub our fists.
It happens when we are angry, right? You just do this.
When your fists are rubbed in anger, before taking action,
I will open each of my fingers one by one.
One by one.
And time-taking.
Take your time.
Take at least 10 seconds to open 10 fingers.
And I guarantee you, this simple tip will control your
anger in 10 seconds.
deep meditation.
Deep meditation.